Here I am, at almost 2am, complaining about myself. I can't sleep again. And this annoying thought of mine came back on my bloody brainless head. witnessed by laptop monitor that face directly to my face and eyes. this always come and go at the wrong timing.
I am a 22 year old single girl. single?? yah single. Sigh... No! i'm not going to nag about being single. No! i'm not gonna tell you how happy I am being single. I'm in dilemma. In the middle of those feeling.
I will tell myself," i'm so glad being a single!" whenever i'm with my other single friends having a good time together. But sometimes my brain will nag,"shit! i wish i can be like that." when i going out with my couple friend. other time i will say," lucky i'm not taken!" if a guy asked me out. but then my heart is aching whenever i'm awake at night. whenever my insomnia comes back. I wish somebody's holding me, kissing me gently and stoping me from crying and say to me," don't you worry. i will always be with you."
i'm very tired and occupied now. thinking about job, my future and this annoying thought just won't leave me alone sometimes.
often, i cried alone in the middle of the night. realising that i am a very different person during the day and during the night. i'm saying here... totally different.
I'm strong yet weak. happy but miserable. life is driving me insane. in the end, only brings me tears.
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1 comment:
Nin,
I ran into your site on friendster, so I went ahead and read it. Sorry if I was too 'kaypoh' for reading it, but that's the idea with e-blog, right? Anyways, I really enjoyed reading your blog, it has the edgy feeling to it, and I can totally get carried over by it. Ooh, and I really enjoy the artwork too (pictures and poem)
Keep up the good work.
~Annys
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