Bad Marriages

I grew up witnessing bad marriage. Husband beats wife, husband with second wife, husband marrying their maid, husband not being intimate with the wife and the last one is a bit different. Wife's not being intimate with her husband.

The last one i just heard about it several days ago. I know they guy. He used to be someone very close to me. He married the girl just after about 1 year they got together. When I got the invitation i was quite skeptical about it. I knew him and it's not his style of relationship. I was right. Now they're going separate way until they can sell their flat which could only be sold next year.

I feel sad for him. He claimed that they have a very different character. They just could not find an agreement in anything. I mean, look at this way, when you have a boyfriend or girlfriend, automatically you'll try to find out their true character and whether you can keep up with their imperfections and whether you guys can get the agreement on their difference.

Now I'm asking myself. Why does marriage seems to be so bad? Do I want to get married after witnessing all the bad ones? Of course I have witness the good ones. But being human, bad ones gives more impression than a good ones.

Gambling = Bad?

Been addicted to gambling these days. I think it's already about a year now.

It all started from going to Genting. I believe those who stays in South East Asia know where it is. For those who are not familiar with it, it is located 45 mins driving off Kuala Lumpur in Malaysia. It is located on top of a mountain so the whether is just fantastic (for me).

Back to gambling, I didn't believe at first that gambling is interesting at all. every dollar that is lost was like a pinch for me. The game goes on and as I won several games, I found myself getting attached to the game. Casino became my favorite place whenever I go for holiday.

It is all about self-control. Come on... Everybody has a problem with it. Don't blame gambling for making people stuck deeper and deeper in their debt or ruining their family. Blame it on them for not being able to control them.

Now I am in front of my TV watching the world's famous World Cup with its most famous game Portugal-Brasil. Beside me is the betting tickets. Yes, ticketS! For me, It's about entertainment! It's about adrenaline! It's about making myself forget about things for a while. It's saver than drugs, saver than drinking.

Alright... the football is getting more interesting than writing this blog. Ciao!

to get married or not to get married. That is the question.

You're 28. Not married. Staying in Asia. You're a problem.

Yup, that's what they think. At least I thought what they think of me and my kind. It's like a pain in the ass for Asian culture to find a girl that is not married in their late 20s. It's like a big sin that you're committing.
It's been about 2 years that I have been haunted by questions and statements like "why aren't you married yet?", "When are you getting married?", "Get married soon! and have lots of children!". Well, I do admit that getting married and having kids is one of human's responsibility in this world. But that is not the only purpose that we are created for.

I find it amusing that people force other people to get married at -they think- the right time. Before 30. I look at marriage as a beginning of all the problem that human need to face. Let's see it this way, if you're not ready to add more problem in your life, why must you?

Alright, I have a friend. Call her Jess. She's in her early 30s. Single. Attractive. Cheerful. 2 years ago she almost marry her ex boyfriend. To cut the story short, she broke up with him. Returned all the valuables that he had bought for her. But the most important thing, she is happier without him that she could ever be. She found out that she just can't marry him.

Jess has a younger brother. Just one year older than me. He has a girlfriend. They had been together for a year and they're getting married early next year.
I asked Jess "Why so fast? Together for a year and that's it? Wow.. they must be madly in love.." She said,"His girlfriend told him that if he doesn't marry her soon, she'll break off with him". "Why?" I asked. "I don't know. I don't think he is ready to get married. Financially. But he's marrying her anyway."
Short and shocking conversation. I mean, what are you chasing for?

My side of the story always comes from my parents. Right now they are worried that my fiance wont marry me when it is damn obvious to them that it is impossible that one of us could live without each other. Eventually, they atopped pushing me about getting married after I told them that I wont get married as long as they are still pushing for that.

Many other stories about marriage i heard from my friends. It is just irritating to have the same questions asked over and over again.